G.I. Joe: Retaliation (2013)

[I'd forgotten about this post until I re-visited my 2013 movie list to see how many I hit. That was early this year. I'm now in the process of finishing my 2013 movie reviews (for a movie about zombies, World War Z isn't exactly easy to write), and then I have to get started on my 2014 ones. Aside from The Lego Movie, I'm adhering to my watch list pretty well.]

The Rock (or, the Batu--Malay for 'rock'--, as my mom and I affectionately call him) seems to be in a LOT of franchises these days.

From the generally-unwatched Walking Tall (previously Kevin Sorbo), to the Journey 2: The Mysterious Island (previously Brendan Fraser), the Batu has now ousted Channing Tatum. I'd like to think that he also tried taking over the Fast and Furious franchise, but how can you go up against a dude named Diesel in a movie about cars?

Anyway, over-exposed or no, I still like him, charm and mega-watt smile and all. I’m just surprised he doesn’t have first billing in the end credits.

The sequel does away with the nanomites and almost all its characters from the first movie, except for the really cool ones and the President decoy. Duke bites the dust within 10 minutes of the film, and the Rock takes over as the franchise’s new hero and leads the remaining few Joes left (after the fake President declares them traitors and exterminates the lot) to save the world from total annihilation.

Considering how much footage they give Lee Byunghyun, they should’ve called this movie The Rise of Storm Shadow. The scene in the trailers where ninjas hang off mountains? It is as awesome as it looks. That is just about the most impressive part of the movie. Interestingly, Storm is exonerated from the murder of his and Snake Eyes’ master, and Storm becomes a kind of anti-hero that doesn’t want to play with Cobra any more.

Kinda makes you wonder what they are going to do with the third movie. Storm and Snake’s feud is just about the most interesting aspect of the film.

Having Bruce Willis as the first ever Joe was gimmicky, but it worked. He’s in a million things these days, so much so I’m getting the feeling he’s phoning it in (Stallone giving him shade regarding the third Expendables movie didn’t help), but he was pretty okay in this film.

In general, this movie is a step up from the first film, though reboots seem to be something very, very convenient these days because I don’t see the reason why everyone but the Korean and the silent one got axed.

Oh well, that’s Hollywood machinery for ya.

P.S. I wasn't really in the mood for a Joe sequel (even though I enjoyed the first movie), but watched it anyway because of the awesome music from the trailer. It's the Glitch Mob remix of The White Stripes' Seven Nation Army. Check out the live version here!